Revised Script

After our test shoot we decided to write a new script in order to increase the time the characters spend inside the house, as well as make the action more interesting for the audience to watch. This is what we came up with between the group, based on our original script:

Lucy:     What the hell Dan!?

(Dan pushes into Lucy and slams into the wall.)

Dan:      Shut the damn door!

(Lucy, closes the door and turns to Dan, worried)

Lucy:     What is wrong with you?

Dan:      This is so messed up.

Lucy:     Dan?

Dan:      Oh crap.

(Dan walks off into the living room, Lucy stands in the doorway for a second, yelling at him)

Lucy:     DAN!

Dan:      Lucy, I screwed up.

(Lucy sits down next to him)

Lucy:     Calm down you idiot.  What happened?

Dan:      You know I went off with the boys last night?

Lucy:     ...yeah

Dan:      Ah god.  Jamie.  He took things too far this time.

Lucy:     Dan?

Dan:      Someone got hurt.

Lucy:     Hurt?  Dan, what the hell did you do?

Dan:      I don’t think he got up.

Lucy:     Christ Dan!  Why did you come here?

(Lucy slaps Dan and stands up, pointing to the door)

Lucy:     Get out!  Just get out!

(Dan stands up and grabs Lucy by the shoulders)

Dan:      It was Ryan. 

Lucy:     Ryan?

Dan:      Your bloody brother turned up.  Your stupid little brother just showed up.

(There is a loud knock at the door)